Sunday, October 09, 2005

i huffed and puffed..

my way thru a slow-moving 20 minutes jog around my estate today.
gosh. my stamina has dipped so so much after the flu bug travelled around my body for about 2 weeks occasionally attacking my nose, and mostly my throat. it's been 1.5 hrs since the end of the run(no, jog i mean), and i still feel my heart beating relatively fast. and after that slow jog, i felt high. saw bright lights, ears were blocked. signs that blood was not getting to my head. and that was when i knew, i should stop my indulgence of 2 cornettos/soleros a day.. but to get my butt moving a bit more often. ooh. and arms too. working with mr lai has made me feel more conscious about my body. not that he's checking me out, but i just feel so... so fat and unfit for my age. i definitely do not want to wait till i become like those people in that photo. who can't even stand up to do exercises. it's... frightening.

oh well, on a more positive note. i scored my first A+ in school! :D well, but it was definitely taiko. considering more than three-quarters of the cohort scored an A for that test. i did feel quite guilty that i scored that A too, cos i didn't put in as much effort as I could have. and tutorials this week were so screwed up. for the MA tutorial, i did the wrong questions 'cos I used the older edition, and for MS, i did the wrong tutorial. and it's already the 7th tutorial. perhaps, i should seriously reflect upon what i have done properly and seriously in my academic life this semester.

somehow, whenever Tuesday(my free day) comes, i will use the entire day to do a report that should have been completed in a few hours. or i will be out in one of those random outings, where i do what my irrational side wants me to do. be it watch a movie alone, or go shopping, or to the library. or i'll stay at home and watch an OC marathon, or watch Home-Fix and all that DIY home furnishing shows on ch 5 while having my favourite lunch of chicken macaroni loaded with parsley soup. and then wait for Entertainment 100 at 5pm on ch U and eat another block of chocolate and sip a cup of Daisy low-fat milk.

AND. nothing will be done. not a single word written for my tutorial. not even my name on the foolscap.

one thing i'm sorely lacking in my idle life - self-discipline.

you know, it's like i tell myself, that i really need this degree to get me a job when i graduate. and that i need at least a CAP 3.5 to get a decent job. and i tell myself, that i have no time to waste. it's just about 4 months worth of hard work, and i can seriously party for 1 whole month.

BUT. =( i just don't have that discipline to do it.

when. when will i realise it? all the money my parents have pumped into my education. and there i am wasting it away. not putting in more effort when i could have. i hate that feeling. of history repeating itself. that same feeling i get after the common tests and promos in JC. that feeling i got after every mid-term test and final exam. all the 'if only i had put in more effort to read that extra chapter, or to do that extra question in the textbook.'

alright. enough ranting for tonight. i need to get going with the executive summary due tomorrow. yea, that's last minute work again.

i crave for rum&raisin ice-cream from Les Amis Gastronomia!

still waiting at 7:56 pm

8comments

8 Comments

at 10:00 pm, October 09, 2005 Anonymous said...: HELLO YATI. Actually I didnt really read your entry YET. hahaha

Got damn bored with the stupid exec summary...so went to read up blogs haha

Just wanna say. The picture you have here damn cute lah!! Filled with cuties =)

See you.
at 10:18 pm, October 09, 2005 surrealist said...: haha. yea, this entry damn long and boring la. i'd advice u to not read it either. just lots of mindless ranting. oh oh! i have another pic of a real cutie! will let u see it soon. :D
at 3:57 pm, October 10, 2005 Drew said...: Hei Jin,
i gonna fly back H.K. for 2 days next tuesday;
anything /stuff / snacks wanna me bring back SG ?

Cheers,
at 10:02 pm, October 10, 2005 madame voilanska said...: haha thinking of drawing the orphans and the missing parents seriously cracks me up man. and its how mean la. haha.
at 11:21 pm, October 10, 2005 surrealist said...: drew: u're gg back to hk again?? hmm.. all that i crave for in hk is the wanton noodles, dong lai cham, dim sum and egg custard. which is not very possible to bring back. :( but thanks for the thought anyway!

lemmmmm: that lai zhenhao is quite a weirdo too la! think abt such stuff. a sadist actually.
at 11:23 pm, October 10, 2005 `leenosophy*\ said...: wootS! tell me about the self discipline. ive got mid terms coming n im so dead. whoopeedoos. school sucks. hahas. (: jiayou barhs.. we can do it. i hope. ahahas!
at 1:05 pm, October 12, 2005 Charleston said...: I should eat all the ice cream for you while you concentrate on being a disciplined student. Win Win Solution
at 12:32 pm, October 16, 2005 surrealist said...: leenosophy > u are gg to do well for ur mid-terms la. just need to put in a bit more time to study, and cut down on procrastinating time. good luck!

charleston > HAHA. sorry, but ice-cream is one of the few pleasures i indulge in life, besides watching The OC, Gokujou Seitokai, Family Guy; eating my favourite Cheese Bugles, Ritter Sport Cornflakes chocolates, Prawn Noodles and Nasi Lemak from Adam Rd Hawker Centre, Fish Porridge from Queensway Hawker Centre, Fried Tofu and Soft-Shell Crab from Sakae Sushi, Sashimi Salad from Sushi Tei, Banana-Chocolate Mousse from Hotel Intercontinental, Chocolate Muffin from Delifrance, Banana-Chocolate Boat from Breadtalk, Yong Tau Foo from NUS Bizad Canteen; listening to bossanova, R&B, lounge music the whole day; and that's about it. :)